booie.
to all mamas in the world: HAPPY MOTHER'S DAY!!!
bad weather todae. keep raining. hope it stops soon. going out for dinner later. hohoho~
the superteen thingy seems rather fun. regretted not going. bahx. but as quoted from wiseteen regret is of no use! so nvm. juz take it tat i no yuan fen with superteen. hahax.
anywaex. juz now matt called to ask bout some eds nitex stuff. reality juz sunk in that eds nitex is juz next sat. LESS A WEEK AWAY. bahx. kinda getting worried now. juz hope the performances will be up to standard n things proceed smoothly. guess everyone is stressed out alreadi. on the other hand...i dun realli wan eds nitex to arrive so early. not bcoz of wat. juz tat after eds nitex. it sorta symbolizes the stepping down and goodbye for secs 4 to leave eds le. i realli dun wan. i can't imagine life without eds in dhs. without eds, i will neva be able to know so many wonderful people in dhs. without eds, i will still be a stupid idiot with a monotonous life. without eds, i dun even noe how to live through my secondary life. now i'm sec 4. goodbye is juz a matter of time. there's no nid to wait till then to know wat i'll feel at tat time. without eds life will kinda be sad, monotonous, aimless, dull and LOST and EMPTY. i dun wan...
feelin veri inferior now. realised tat mai way of thinking and thoughts is veri childish. still stuck in like p6 sec 1 kind. i should grow up le. veri pei fu some ppl. hahax. so many..lazy to say all out. juz SOME PEOPLE. they r so inspiring. i hope i can be like them. i realli hope...but i noe i can neva be like them.
i neva believe in future. neva believe in setting goals. neva believe in miracles. i onli live from day to day. neva tink of future. tat's xplain y i'm such a shi bai ze. ppl say set goals for future and believe in ourselves makes life more enriching...more meangingful when u haf a aim. but for mi i find goal setting veri pressurizing. isn't it stressful tat u give pressure to urselves to achieve something... wouldn't it beta to let everything take its natural course? hmm. hard question. but even after attending such camps and c so many successful people as examples..i realise the importance of setting aims blahx blahx...i dun tink i can ever convince maiself to settle down and set goals even though my mind tells mi to. haiX.
i realli wan to achieve something in life...but i dun realli wan to face all the stress and pressure. after some experience..it sorta shaped my mindset tat life is fragile n y trample on it by giving urself so much pressure? no matter now noble r u..how successful...how knowledgeable...how rich...how reluctant to leave ur family...one day you will still be stricken with illness and leave the world. it is juz a matter of time.
n wen sometimes i wan to work hard wan to put in effort wan to acheive goals..this idea will juz pop out of mai brain and convince my mind and soul not to and extinguish my passion or wateva determination i haf. feel so useless and weak at tat point.
there's nth eternal in life. not knowledge. not success. not love. not even family ties. yeah family ties r bloodbonded. parents' love for the children will never extinguish. children's love for parents will not be diminished. love for siblings will not be shaken. but wat's the use. wen one is gone. everything is gone. no matter how much u love them. how much u dun wan them to go and leave u all alone facing life. but nevertheless...family ties shld still be the most cherished thing while we have the chance to. so now...everybody go hug ur papa n mama n say u love them. u won't regret it. :) friendship muz cherished too. i love u gals! hope u all will pardon my wrongdoings :) stuff like knowledge, results, love, success, even money...is it tat impt..? maybe once in mai life i view some as the important part of my life. but now. i feel that emphasizing on so many things in life is stressful and painful. of course i'll still get bothered by results and other stuff to some degree...but i'll reduce tat to the minimum in time. i will. i onli wan my family and friends. may they be happy always. :)
oh gosh. this blog is going to be my crapping place where i crap a whole junk of stuff. oops. okay. not actually crap. coz they come from the bottom of mai heartx. lolx. dun tink much ppl frequent here anywaex so it's safe to crap. hahahX.
cya.
~`i realli dun wan to remain childish and immature my whole life... ... ... i realli dun wan.`~
~`there's some stuff everyone wan to forget. their guilt. their pain. their loss. their regrets. their love.their hatred. their scary experience of being betrayed. the frightening experience of being insignificant. i'm no exception.`~
