booie.
yeah. second time blogging.
can't get to slp. been tossing around in bed since 10. argh.
i wan to zzz. sleeP!!!
but i juz can't do it.
shall accompany the lonely com which is left open since 7 plus wen i reach home coz if i shut it down juz now my brother can dream about using it later.
hearing lin jun jie. watching his mtv. lalala~
it seems like ages since i touch tat bk. the cover is like a million tonnes of lead. so heavy. took mi so much effort juz to flip open the first page. there's onli 4 pages filled with words. n the notebook is no much bigger than my palm. but it seems like hours to get my eyes off every single word. they seems to be crawling their way to my heart. burning my heart as i read on. melting. it hurts. i neva add any thing to the bk b4. todae is the first time. but wat's the use. it's overdue too long. juz toooo longggg. not even the different weather n storms can make any difference.
but no matter wat how much it stings mi how much it hurts. the bk is still one of the most impt things. every time i flip it open seems to be the first time i'm reading it. with tinge of happiness. yet overwhelming with regret n sadness. juz reading it may be torturous. may be tough. but i will. i will. till the day i'm released from my own jail.
it is juz so ironic to be jailed in my own jail. i m the one who created this damn jail. yet i'm trapped in it maiself. all by maiself. the other convicts have all escaped and gained their freedom.
for a moment i tot i realise a small little reason of my depression. it is conscience at work. as well as reality. harsh reality. people's views. people's thoughts. i feel condemned to the eighteenth floor of hell. never to be saved or freed. i feel despised. i feel ashamed. i feel tat ppl tink tat i'm sux-ky. which is the truth.
shucks. now my heart feels so heavy. y is it always b4 i slp. deep in the night. then i get all these weird brainwaves. hmmx.
tml will be a long long dae. sat will be a longg daee too.
gotta slp le.
shall coax maiself to zzz.
will i dream again?
will i dream of the fairytale?
can the fate of the fairytale twist like a x^2 graph?
neh. i doubt so.
cya. nitex.
`~qUesTioN of tHe daE~`
CaN promisEs tAt r brokEn bE menDeD? caN proMIseS taT r BrokeN bE forGottOn? caN pRomisE breAkEr bE pArdOneD? caN promIse breakEr'S viCtIm fORgiVe?
++ reality tells mi ur answer is N-O. guess we think alike. ++
